they just came back. i guess "were gonna go get dinner" means "were gonna fuck for 5 minutes at the little league field"
Fuck their fairy tale bullshit. I shall ruin it. With a few thrusts of my cock.
I just found out the FDA voted to ban Vicodin, my last connection to this world has been destroyed
I just sneezed and had an orgasam..THAT turned on
Dude I think I vomited on the wireless internet box too...it isnt working.
I tried really hard to get you laid last night. And by that I mean I asked a bunch of dudes if they were top or bottom.
Going home with an argentinian named sulvio. Ill let you know how it goes.
Oh my god please beg your father to turn the car around so you can possibly get laid by a knight at medieval times.
Lol I just left. He's funny and he's cute. Downside: he thinks he can outdrink us
It's my 3rd annual 21st birthday party. Disney themed. There will be blood.
I dont know but I had two different hospital bands and half a pie when i woke up.
There's a naked man in my car right now.
My mom just told me not to dance on any tables on Halloween...I'm choosing to take that statement as a joke
he sneezed into my face mid-kiss
Bless his heart
You left me a message at 3am crying because you just found out there's a Paddington Bear statue in Peru.
Randomize
