But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
I just puked in an auto zone parking lot. I'm never eating peanut butter and red wine for dinner again.
Im so hungover
Come over i have rolls
Ecstasy rolls or Challah rolls?
The sex was so not worth the four dollars it cost to drive over the bridge
what if every blade of grass was a penis?
i'm so high that my cigarette just tasted like chef boyardee. no lie.
You named all of the cocktail shrimps and then tackled a guy for "eating Henry"
So many people have lost their virginity on my futon... I think it is only the right thing to bronze it and put it on display
I've got 2 dollars. How do I turn this into alcohol?
My apartment smells like a lavender field inside of a giant bong.
If I could sit on this toilet forever I would totally do that right now
What the matter? A girl can't play some Super Mario without being accused of being high?
Guess who's the proud owner of her very own foxtail butt plug!!
this is the second day the intern has gotten me coffee. he either wants to bang me or thinks I'm more important than I am.
either way he's in for disappointment
Whatever he got a sick blow job and his high school fantasy was fulfilled
And that's what dreams are made of
*hilary duff crying in the background*
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