i effin hate jeff goldbloom.
but i totally would still bang him
I wanted to dispute a few 411 charges on my phone bill. The service rep told me I called them four times asking for Lady Gaga's number.
Everytime I think about NYE, my gag reflex kicks in.
don't worry about the neighbors I'm like 99% sure all that snow covered a good portion of our vomit
Its trashy in the best of ways. Like a stripper working to pay for college.
Its official. Girls from Indiana do not give rim jobs.
and then the entire party sang the national anthem a capella around the keg.
Also, I'd like to add that that I'm not quitting my job, my boss fed me shots at 11 am this morning.
I fucked your brother... Hey, at least we know he is not gay... You're welcome.
No our divorce decree will not have a blow job clause. Unless my alimony is greatly increased your bj's have been reduced to fantasy status.....
Just took adderall with about half a bottle of red wine...i have stopped trying for this last exam
Tell him to put up or shut up. Can't be dangling dick in front of ho's without delivering.
It's just disrespectful
I think my pickup truck has been used for the sex... This doesn't sit right with me.
leads to pukin, then cryin, then 24hr masturbatin binge, then cryin again and finally a combination of all 3
but dude how did I get so drunk?
Pretty sure it happened right after you poured a shot of Wild Turkey into your Budweiser, chugged it, and screamed "I. NEVER. BACK. DOWN!"
Randomize
