How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
I just saw some girl with the liscense plate "OBVIII"...I never wanted to get in a car accident so badly.
It was scary, we all screamed. Never make mimosas in a car.
IM PICKING UP BLOW FOR US STOP WHINING ABOUT SEX
Remembering I sold my brand new Blackberry to a stranger for a few pints = Worst night of my life. Now to work out what I did with my shoes.
uh, 3 redbulls and 400mg of caffeine pills and i still feel like life is in slowmotion..lets not take tranquilizers again.
His personality is sparkling but nothing beats his ass
Just drug him and when he wakes up be like "you just woke up from a coma, we've been married for the past five years." It'll be like the Vow but fucked up.
Drunk yoga at 11 am turned into me sitting on the couch making fun of the girl in the instructional video. By the way, what the fuck is a third eye?
I'm 50% sure my cousin put weed in these deviled eggs.
I sent him this really overly apologetic text asking him out. It was just sad. Not even 27 shots of whiskey can grow me a self-esteem.
SEX BINGO!
Canadian or clown?
When are your genitals available?
Would love to dress up in respectable attire and take you out somewhere nice and then do disgusting crude things in public
I love the smell of your bedroom. It smells of a mixture of cherries, leather, and unrequited homosexual desire.
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