glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
i just peed out my two story window using my cell phone as a flashlight . hope the neighbors didnt see
what do people who dont have blackberrys do while they poop?
Coffee flavored vodka sounded like such a good idea at the time. Now i never want to drink coffee again.
i just peed with my friends in your backyard... do you still live here
I think my cats understand what porn is. And it's all my fault.
I rolled out of the car, crawled on all fours to the door, did somersaults all the way to my room, and then I ran across the parking lot to tell our neighbor you wanted to bang him. I'm not even sure if it was the right guy.
I'm hungry
Come here to eat and play. It'll be like Dave and Busters except with sex
Bad Decision October is in full swing. I was telling people that "I put on eye makeup today, I'm takin' a dude home with me!".
I think I've just evolved into some kind of vodka fueled monster
MY MOM IS GOING TO SMOKE WITH ME.
SHE'S GOING TO SMOKE HIGH QUALITY MARIJUANA WITH ME.
Did I send you a drunk selfie with a pine tree last night?
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
Desperate times call for desperate measures. But he promised me no small talk so that was nice
I just threw up a strange neon green substance. Did I eat a glow stick last night?
Randomize
