she uses ice cubes and hums anything I want. Last night was Welcome to the jungle. it wasnt lost on me shes a puma. no shame in that 30+ game.
im sorry but my first introduction to your dick isn't going to be a pic sent from the men's room
I don't want to eat him, he probably tastes terrible.
Not to make her into that kind of girl, but she did have a condom mural
Just went outside to gather hail to use to make margaritas since we ran out of ice. That's God's way of helping us out.
please hold off on going into labor, i might need you to take me to the free clinic
I have discovered that there is nothing that a giant penis attached to a southern accent can't talk me into. yee-haw!
He told me he loved me and then asked if we could have sex in the snow
You know how I've been hooking up with my ex? Well he told me he loved me and I said I was just there for sex so let's get it done. He looked sad, but he did it anyways. And life was good again.
I ended up passing out on the shitter for like an hour with mcds smoothie all over my face
I am day drunk. Get ready to see my dick.
Plan B, arranged marriage to a rich Indian, is rapidly becoming Plan A. Fuck Finals.
Am I required to send a Christmas card to my fuck buddy?
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
i hooked up with all four beatles on halloween get on my level
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