She just sent me a txt where every word ended in "zzz", with about a hundred "!!!" and called herself "juicezzz". I need back up.
It smells like Drakkar Noir and desperation out here.
That's why you should quit smoking.
Wine smoothie.... Not as good as I thought it would be
Just got done reading an 11 page essay for class. Took me three fucking days and the only thing I have highlighted is the name "Alexander Cockburn"
Biggest lesson I have learned in college: Drink if you are happy. Drink more if you aren't.
I just couldn't help myself when there was a FOUNTAIN OF SHOTS
I have to cancel. My sons dad is out of jail unexpectedly and i'm kinda an emotional wreck. P.s. This is not the life I dreamed of as a little girl.
Nope she woke up in a hotel room alone on 55th street. A guy in a lamborgini gave her a ride this morning. She was walking barefoot home
I woke up naked, with the lights on, using my backpack as a pillow and a pillow as a blanket.
when was she peeing in the stairwell? why dont i remember this?
....because generally we only remember 40% of the night each, and have to fill eachother in. And that still leaves 20% that we will never know and its probably for the best
Sorry I can't go bowling with you guys. I'm getting daytime dick. That's the best kind.
Its a cash in stratch tickets to afford cigarettes and coffee kind of friday
Hey also tomorrow casually bring up wearing crocs to your sister's wedding
What the fuck happened last night.... I woke up with a bowl half full of ravioli next to my head, reversed on my bed still fully clothed.....
Ok, not to minimize the significance of that beautiful anecdote from your childhood, but here's a video of my penis.
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