I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
At least I can take solace in the fact that with 8 billion some odd people in the world, at least one of them is shitting in their own car right now.
I literally just saw a campus policeman riding a Segway pull over a moving car. you should just give up.
Hookup with hot guy from gym, check. Wake up to find he's peed in my closet, double check.
Life lesson learned last night, if you are too drunk to use the atm leave the strip club
Just filled the brita up in the bathtub because we couldn't get it into the sink.
we all took turns holding you up and pretending that you were simba and that we were presenting you to the jungle
So we just accidentally broke into a building from the third floor while carrying shovels. The security guards are still very confused
Oh my god he's laying on a longboard singing the song from cool runnings.
there's an entire drinking game devoted to nobody liking her face
How is it??
I'm drinking Gatorade out of a champagne flute.
They have beer where we have blood.
You know you hit Mardi Grad bottom when you come to in someone's kitchen on the floor and you are eating gumbo out of a Mixing bowl with a ladle......yeah rock fucking bottom
after the ketamine those signs on the bathroom door had little meaning to us
i can feel my liver failing just LOOKING at that thing
Randomize
