I've eaten ice cream, mentos, an extreme gulp and swedish fish today. i feel like diabetes. the actual disease not a person with it.
My number went up to seventeen today. I forgot to add my random hookup on a sailboat.
I'm bringing in a picture of a stranger on facebook to get my haircut. I have reached a new level of creepy.
False alarm it was margarita mix all over my hands not blood
No idea how he made them, but vodka water balloons were a horrible idea.
I think I was using my hair to catch my vomit last night.
You were.
We're only going to be this young and this cute but for so long. And how often is it that a pack of Albanian law students is in your house?!
I vaguely recall putting a toaster in the freezer.
His legs actually look hot in that dress. He might even make a better girl than Josh
You continued to run around saying "free the nipple" while "taste testing" every liquor on the premises.
Yeah, I've hit on priests at bars, too. Such a shame, there are a lot of hot men out there who've devoted themselves and their glorious genitalia to the Lord -_-
New goal find someone I love enough to use these Japanese pancake flavored condoms on
Just had to tell a NYC cop I was doing the Dougie in a houndstooth jumper so he could find me in the security video.
We should get drunk in walmart
when?
20 minutes ago
Where are you guys?
Drunk
Randomize