I think I just made patron unclassy I bought limes at a gas station and for salt we are using gas station packets of salt
This is much more drunk than i was intending for a wednesday
we literally spent four hours convincing you that all 5 of your toes were there. no more everclear on a tuesday.
I just undressed him with my eyes. And gave him a 10 inch penis. I hope its true.
He wouldn't let me go down on him. He stopped me and told me he was a giver.
i'm just sitting here going through her tagged pics, covering up different parts of her face to try and figure out exactly what it is that makes her so ugly.
its the kind of pain that only someone with a fucking elephant on their head would understand. I'm never drinking again.
I may have made out with a tranny last night, which, if I don't get fired for everything else that happened, really makes last night epic.
Now that makes it sound like you had sex with a guy in batman costume and you never took the mask off so you can't 100 percent be sure.
if i had known the extra weight would have gone to my tits, i would have started drinking years ago
he said he was going to fuck me like a rabbit in heat. What he should have said was faster then a train and over before a commercial
Do you think you could cook pancakes while i blow you?
It was a strange night. I made out with his college roommate and said "do you care?" beforehand.
I think I had Hypothermia but was too drunk to notice.
He is saved in her phone as Sir. Mindfuck <3/ vag cleaner of course I need to meet him.
Randomize