Peanut Butter and turkey sandwich...this may come back to haunt me
Those 2 guys from the sonic commercial will be virgins for life.
Sarah Palin just got hired for Fox News. Watch out Jersey Shore... there's a new drinking game in town
So, you didn't have time to come pick me up but you did have time to get plastered and then write "champagne money" on every one of my statuses for the past month?
after he came i started crying. just to fuck with his head.
Don't worry, nothing happened....but we should have a fire extinguisher here.
As much as I'm all for laying on his living room couch, watching spongebob and having spoon sex, it's becoming a routine.
Also while I am being the bigger person I plan on bringing over something strong smelling and/or alcoholic to torture the poor hungover bastard
Don't make it weird, I don't think about you when I'm climaxing, it's just that I see you rooting me on.
In this town being related to a brewing family or the owner of a sports team is like being royalty. It's like hooking up with the queen's nephew or something.
We did Irish Car Bombs out of butter trays, the influence of the retired community is astounding- I didn't know people even owned more than one butter tray.
I hate when pubes grow back. My mons is a warzone.
It's days like today that make me happy I'm not a porn star.
YOU ARE STRONGER THAN YOUR VAGINA
Maverick's sitting in jail wearing a turkey costume and I am soooo jealous.
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