And he showed us your test. You wrote what is this shit and scribbled on it? Nice 3%..
This was all being yelled across a beer pong table as all important things should be discussed
threw up in a bar last night and got laid on an air mattress. my bucket list just got a lot shorter
Do you knowwwwww you never ha to pee while lhr on eztacy
i think this is the gayest thing you've ever shown me. and i'm pretty sure you've sent me pictures of a dude sticking his dick in a horse's nose.
It's 1 AM and there's a guy outside my house belting out Bennie and The Jets. He stops in between verses to puke. I'm joining him.
Just helped a homeless man panhandle outside of Wawa, made him $6.31. Where are you?
the only thing you and i have in common is the we like weed and looking at my naked body.
We got to the hotel at 12AM with nothing but a plastic bag of magnum condoms and lube, while wearing glow sticks. The receptionist handed us a bunch of water bottles and said "These are on us.", not even phased by three dudes about to have a threesome. I love this town.
I saw it and almost just was like "Ice breaker: your penis is massive" but I didn't.
I don't know, I think having hemorrhoids shows character. You have to be trying pretty hard to get them.
Because making bad decisions is what makes our house great and I don't plan on changing that anytime soon.
Instead of saying hi she asked if she could touch your dick through your ski bib and NOW I understand why you wore it to the bars
Don't come back. They don't have pants.
Oh god.
God has nothing to do with this.
The last thing I remember was them slipping shots into my beer bong, and me being happy about it
Randomize
