seems the shocker is way more shocking if u get the fingers wrong
So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
I tried to cut him off and he said "I was the president of a fraternity for 3 years, I could outdrink God."
nothing worse than sitting down ready for a solid porn sesh to find out your internet is out. comcast owes me a handjob
I want him to be my next love. So I'm taking it slow
As in ill only blow him next week
She brought a box of chocolates to give the bartender and now he's giving her free shots.. Why didn't we think of that?
What can I say? When alcohol is my motivation, I can move mountains.
I filled two of the glass ornaments in my mom's bathroom last night with vodka. That way no one sees me drinking on Christmas. Alcoholic or genius? All I know it makes bathroom trips frequent and enjoyable.
just reminessing about the wedding and were they seriously to tight to serve a meal oorrrrrr was it just another one of my black-out-by-dinner drunks
the fact that you actualy have a 'black-out-by-dinner drunk' is a bit deserving..
You fucked him. I baby bird fed him whiskey . I feel like we've bonded.
It was fine until they started lighting shots of everclear on fire and making ME take them. That's when shit went down...
Sorry man, but I'd rather do drugs with strangers than watch sports with you. It's not personal, drugs always beat sports.
I can get there in 20, one question, Drress Code? Stripper Lite (make up may require an additional 5-10 minutes), Suggestive Professor (professor Kamil's cleavage ain't got nothing on me), Daywear, Dyke (and trust me you ain't seen dyke), or Exactly What I'm Wearing Right Now. (all of the above may arrive under a coat and are subject to my level of sobriety. Which is currently like nonexistent).--xoxo you know you love me, Gossip Girl.
He gave me a box of cheez-its after sex, does that make me a hooker?
Awww I'm so proud! Starting friendships before you hook up!
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