Being pregnant is so damn inconvenient for my sex life.
And then I'm going to yell into her vagina and see if it echoes
i feel like my eyelids need a kick stand.
So drunk can't even tell it's my own house. WOaoOw.
The UPD just told me that he was going to call the cops if i try to run. you owe me 5 dollars, i told u they arn't real cops
Its a bummer that corporate america doesn't believe in $2 u call its on a Sunday night
I couldn't function. I was to the point where I was using a bottle cap as a monocle.
He said my labia gave my vagina a "cute personality"
I just look at my butt and see so much potential.
I would professionally fuck the shit out of her
he sent a dick pic to my best friends phone for me cause mine died lol pretty sure he was regretting that night outta town.
You know it’s going to be a rough day when you scream “Get fucked” at your alarm clock
She was crying and pulled the collar of her shirt up to blot the tears. And then she just kept her head there. And stopped crying. "My boobs are just too amazing for me to cry." her words not mine please help she's still in that position
You start to question your morals when you wake up at 430 and there's three people naked...that you don't no
I’ve looked at so many mouse vaginas in the past week
Randomize
