Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
can you buy anything in the cafeteria for less than $2? I spent the last of my laundry money on a chia pet
i was concerned by what you said you would do for a snickers. It wasn't even a Klondike bar.
Last night I went to an anything but cups party. I took a hummingbird feeder. It was a terrible decision.
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
My therapist told me it was ok for me to "take risks" now. Cue the hookers and blow.
he puked in my glove box, looked up at me and said "There's not much to say"
saying that you may be able to suck the gay out of me was just my way of getting a blowjob...thank you for the valiant effort.
I woke up to him drunk-t-bagging me, saying "huevos rancheros" were being served for breakfast.
We somehow managed to get the sumo-wrestler costume into the washing machine, but I don't think the cupcake icing completely came off... And it still smells like tequila.
It feels kinda weird thanking you for sucking my dick, but I just don't know what else to do right now
Just me. You're probably having sex with her right now, so here's a reminder that you should be thinking of me per our agreement.
Its like he woke the dragon, and the dragon is hungry for a good dick.
Don't forget to make sex 3rd on your calander
Birthday wine tasting got super shambly super quickly. I am covered in cuts/bruises/terrible life decisions.
Randomize
