my door was closed and her door was closed but even over the r.kelly playing at full blast i was able to hear her say "THAT'S NOT THE RIGHT HOLE!". Def rethinking my roommate situation.
There was this creepy guy on the bus. So I puffed out my stomach & began so hold my stomach like I was preggers.
You're the only person with a favorite bar in Disneyworld
No one goes out in public like that, unless they do anal
I threw up into my coffee this morning.
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
I was cleaning out my bag and I found some xanax wrapped in plastic with a note that said "use in case of emergency"
high. he's playing 'oops i did it again' on the ukelele. is this real life?
What time did you start drinking?
Maybe.
Maybe isn't a time...
Can't we have real sex instead of you just thrusting the air near me?
If there was a category for "most likely to end up a serial killer" in your high school yearbook then I'm sure you would have won it
Also I've accepted I am not going to be a catch today. I look like a dead hooker and the remedial work is going to be patchy at best with the shakes I've got.
this isn't the first time i woke up with peanut butter in my butt
Well I want to be mistreated and called a slut and finger banged
But I guess hugs would be nice
We walked into the RA's room and he said "is that alcohol" and I screamed "IT'S WATER" and ran out and Vanessa slammed the door and started making out with him.
Randomize
