And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!"
What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy.
He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie."
as evidence of my kitchen this morning my night involved alot of mustard and condoms
i was so high last night while i was driving i felt like i was riding a bike with no pedals
I wonder who the first pervert was, and if he would be proud of me for advancing his art form by so much
she would only give me a road handjob because she didnt want to unbuckle
safety first
Played "Which Couple Will Take Me Home Tonight" at the bar last night... I can now cross three-some off my bucket list
every time fb tells me a dude i fucked is now friends with another dude ive fucked, i die a little inside. thats way more honesty than im comfortable with.
No big deal, we were just two friends having sex. It's perfectly normal we don't remember. Water under the sex bridge,
In fairness it was pretty good sex, but I still wasn't expecting the mass cheering and applause he got on leaving my tent
This should be a warning to men everywhere: do not send pictures of your erect penis to women you hardly know - they will add cats and send them to all of their friends.
Drunk naked twister. My place. Heath is trying to use his dick as a third leg.
I'll be in SoCal at my bachelorette party, aka embracing a fireman covered in KY and chocolate shavings.
Regret, thy taste is box wine.
If I win the lottery I'm going to hire someone to skywrite "FUCKTARD" over his house. That much anger.
Be careful, there is sex in the air.
Randomize
