i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
He ate me out. It was like watching him trying to win a pie eating contest
It smells like wine and fried chicken. Im confused and intrigued.
just learned how to wash a penis. thank you nursing school for getting me the most action i've had in months.
Found a left over fake Olympic medal from our party last weekend. Awarded it to a random girl in the bar last night. Its the only thing she was wearing this morning when she woke up at my place.
Also, just grabbed a bunch of "tuxedo black" condoms. formal, anyone?
Even my psychiatrist thinks I should fuck the married guy.
guys I just made $20 cause these random south african guys thought I wasn't wearing any underwear
You don't understand. On her lunch break she sits on the roof, stares into the sky, and chain smokes. I can't get on her level. She is made up of java monsters with whiskey and a voice that sounds like sex.
You need to stop crushing on your boss or fuck her.
I was watching porn and wanted to change the tab to another video to cum but I clicked the wrong tab and it was a gif of a dog but I was coming and couldn't do anything so did I jill off to a dog? I feel like I should be guilty
There's weed in my toothpaste. Explain.
It's like all the guys I keep around if I wanna have sex with all got mad at the same time. I guess I'll get out my vibrator again.
He got the life proof phone case so he could jack off in the shower without his wife knowing
These snow days are takeing a toll on my liver
WAIT YOU’VE NEVER BEEN TO COSTCO???
COSTCO IS MAGICAL
I can’t believe you two made a group text to scream at me about Costco.
Randomize
