She's JV to your varsity
I wish I had my old roomstes number so I could send him pictures from lastnight... I had a blast banging his "true love" now that I think about it we're even don't worry about that gas bill you didn't pay. Ur girl worked it off!
I thought he was joking about bailing you out until I saw the picture of you and the sheep in the morning paper. Were those my boots you had on it
Made out with me girlfriend while she was peeing. all time high, or all time low?
I love reading their "i love you more" , "no i love you more" war on facebook today knowing that he hooked up with me last night. I bet i know who wins that one.
I take it we used my cleavage as a pen holder last night during the graffiti party. Looks like the colours of Crayola exploded all over my chest
You are a booty call, not a friend.
But I wanna cuddle and just put my hand awkwardly close to your penis area by accident and look at you
I have one of those hangovers where you visualize how awesome it would be to climb in your fridge and drink glacier water
His constant posting of "inspirational" Taylor Swift quotes over the past 3 days has me a little worried. It's like, holy shit dude, you're almost 30.
do me a favor, I need this weekend off so can you work your magic and blow my boss again?
I asked him to help me break in the space ship aka my bed.
Does she know she is talking to people who slam shots of fireball and chase it with vodka?
Let the healthy eats/juice cleanse begin. Today is day 1
Have you cleansed yourself of the boy yet?
I swear I only fuck him for the huge bottle of smart water he gives me afterwards.
Randomize
