How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
you probably should not have drank the wine that everyone spits out. and the sad part, that was not even your low point last night
Not really fighting over the same girl. He takes her out to dinner and then I come over and fuck her. We've worked out the perfect relationship.
I'm the only adult here not drinking and their 2 year old daughter is trying to play dolls with me.. I've never been so demoralized in my life.
2nd semester senior, always drunk. at this point if i don't get a good parking spot, i turn around and drive home
You passed out in my bathroom last night. I put a towel over your face so I could shit without it being gay
and yes i will spend 10 dollars on a vibrating toothbrush to masturbate but not a calculator for my test
Listen, you can whine about not having a "red" wine glass, or you can suck it up and chug it from the vase like the rest of us. The choice is yours.
If I should ask "why am I still single?" could someone please remind me of shooting mike and ikes out of my nose at the bartender last Saturday. many thanks
Im pretty sure that girl just said "Im taking you home even if your girlfriend has to come too." Why are we here again?
We were destined to go to rehab together
You just sat there for two solid hours staring at your monitor and every five minutes screamed "LEGOOOOOS"
I like it here so far, only people are a lot less accepting of my terrible decisions and it's cramping my style
Don't worry about us we're making Mac and cheese
MAC AND CHEESE ABORTED, WE HAD FIRE
I woke up with my converse still on and a plate of pasta next to my face, if that gives you any indication of how my night went
Randomize
