Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
so I was just driving high and I stopped to let a pinecone cross the road because I thought it was a hedgehog.
you opened the fridge, pissed on the food, fell over, then threw up on yourself. thats whats all over the kitchen.
I took her to see 2012 then broke up with her, the movie was a metaphor.
Playing hide and seek with all those cheeseburgers... Not our finest moment.
stopped you just in time from sledding down the roof.
He hid IN a snowbank for 2 hours waiting for me to come home. This game has to stop before someone dies.
Typical Sunday afternoon purchase of condoms and a helium tank.
He won't sleep with me again until I commit...
Run. There is other dick in the sea, less clingy dick.
I was the girl at the bar last night passing out free condoms and making sure everyone knew how to use them to keep the population down
You throw up behind 1 mannequin and it's world war 3 in forever 21
I woke up with my shoes still on and my pants around my ankles cause I couldn't get them over my shoes
There's just something so liberating about drinking a beer with no pants on
Bring me pizza. I'll trade you your underwear you left here for 2 slices.
Is it too forward if I ask him to bring a condom when he comes over to work on our project?
Randomize
