I'm drive I can fine osifer
First of all...stop making excuses. Second of all...Fuck the surgeon generals warning
nothing like walking down the street with a garbage bag of puke trying to find a dumpster
with your flexibility, and the size of my penis, amazing things are possible.
Just made nicotine water. Ithink i'm having a heart attack.
Shit. I'm running the whole hotel right now. The front desk girl had to run home because she left her vibrator on the counter and her brother, mom, and grandmother surprised her and are showing up to her place before she gets off work. This will end badly no matter what.
She gave me what I will now dub a "hurricane sandy". Loud, wet and sloppy BJ that made me want to stay home and complain about shit on the Internet
In the pie chart of my life, she is a huge part of why I drink.
It has gotten to a point where I just want to sit on his face. Less butterflies, more orgasms.
Ooo, yeah! Thanksgiving will be a blast. Can't fuckin wait for the next round of "have you found a nice young man yet?" Followed by a lovely helping of "don't worry, there's someone out there for you."
Let us rub each other in fish scales and become mermaids
All she said to me before going to get another shot was "Damn, I'd eat her out."
MY HAND WILL BE UP HIS ASS IF HE DOES NOT APOLOGIZE FOR WHAT HE DID. IT WON'T BE THE GOOD-FEELING KIND OF "HAND-UP-ASS" EITHER.
I was about to break it off with him because I realised he only wanted me for sex, until I realised that I only wanted HIM for sex. Win/win
last night you made out with a 19 year old on a bar and i woke up with a swede in my bed. lets just say that never happened.
Randomize
