I plan on using my big titties for evil tonight.
So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
I jumped on his cock in 2 seconds flat. Thanks mom for sending me to gymnastics when I was a kid.
You kind of have a nervous, desperate thing going on that isn't exactly catnip for bitches
The only way to make beer can wizard staffs any better is to sew your own wizards robe and hat to go along with it. welcome to tuesday nights at my new apartment
I lost the back to your old name tag last night in a girls shirt. It got me a view of some titties though, I guess in some way you're still doing your brotherly deeds
He was so drunk and proud of his 6-month-gym-results he actually made me touch his whole naked body.
You spent the entire night trying to get me to make out with you
yeah I remember. your boyfriend shouldnt have cheered me on though.
found one of my socks in the dishwsaher... xanax
He dated a girl who could do the damn splits on his dick like how do you compete with that
Mischief managed.
YOU ARE NOT A MARAUDER, WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO NOW?
This is either the best idea i've ever had or the worst. stay tuned.
you know you're in deep when you watch fear and loathing in las vegas and every damn scene is relatable.
I can't remember what I did last night, but judging from the state of my hair I had a pretty good time.
we had to invent a new word for how drunk I was last night
Randomize
