ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
Is it a step in the wrong direction to ask my parents for a kegerator for graduation?
he made a bald eagle out of coke lines
You ordered 6 boxes of pizza and laughed in the pizza guys face when you didn't pay for any of them.
Was just told that I was slipped 2 hits of acid in my in flight drink before takeoff. 8 hours to Germany wish me luck
My cock is literally on the edge of falling off. Fuck Vegas.
Would a ten year old streaker be inappropriate?
That's the stuff legends are made of
Yeah, tell that to my thumb. Cause it was up my ass all night waiting for you.
You also proposed and then tried to jack me off
Everyone's impressed that I actually got pee all over his car since I'm a girl and they're a little curious..
I THINK it was the lead singer. Whoever he was, I have his number and his dick was pierced.
It was totally the lead singer.
You guys had reggaeton music playing while dry humping? Definition of romance.
I came in like 30 seconds, and my dog got to watch me take the walk of shame to the bathroom to clean up. All in all, not my best performance.
nothing like waking up to a voice mail saying your std test came back negative
I realize that my conversation topics seem to only be about bees and my cross dressing fiance. Thank you for being my friend.
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