Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
Me liking this guy is the best diet ever. Do I want this cookie...or do I want to get laid.
You asked the dj to play 'who let the dogs out" because it was your birthday. You left the bar and then re-entered to the song
There's a girl n class drinking wine out of a taco bell cup. I can smell it.. it's totally reisling. JEALOUS.
you're letting him buy you a plane ticket...to kentucky...so you can fuck him?
i know. i'm only adding to the interstate sex trade problem.
We can talk tomorrow when we're both alert. My mind is somewhere else right now.
Where's it at?
In your pants.
we knew we'd be okay when we walked up to the dealers house and he asked us to please be quiet as to not wake his nana.
This girl has a mullet weave. I missed oakland.
The judge mental looks i am getting while looking at porn on my phone sitting in the urgent care waiting room is gonna get way worse when they find out im here to see if im pregnant
He is nice. Kind of short though. But didn't try to rub his jean cock on me.
Which I appreciated.
My passport was stamped in Canada two weeks ago. One step closer to uncovering wtf happened that night
We were drunk waiting for tacos and I gave him a handy in the back of the Uber while giving the driver relationship advice. I think I'm handling the whole grad school thing alright.
I've had more sex since the twins moved in than I'd had in the previous four years. They are the best wingman ever.
not only did u rap a voicemail to me last night.... but it lasted so long that it cut you off so you called back to finish..... never do this again
I know you want to take a pregnancy test, but could you wait until Sunday so it doesn't ruin our weekend
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