Whore.
I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
she really just asked how mermaids reproduce.
i dont know you, but i just did a line with your business card.
I definitely didn't wake up this morning thinking "i wanna get gang banged today"
I wish there were college classes that were useful to your daily life, like how to pack a proper bowl in pitch black darkness.
Just because he's a soilder doesn't mean his dick is a hero.
It smelled like mall pretzels. Of course I investigated.
Call me next time you want to get irresponsibly drunk when we have grown up things to do the next day.
another part of my inner child died when i emptied my crayon bank for dollar beer night.
What's the politically correct way of saying you've made someone your bitch?
ugh I gave him morning sex and he doesn't even text me back for my bagel order
have no fear, swaggie olivia is here to bring glorious gifts and horse dick to children
Taking out my recycling and 90% of it is alcohol and cat food. I am judging myself.
i didnt realize that your first thought would be SEXUALIZING BREAD
Yeah, let's go with that. Fuck that weak moment of complete honesty I just had.
Randomize
