and trust me i need no booty pop lessons
We made a drinking game out of poaching eggs. When did our life turn into a really awesome version of Top Chef?
I managed to throw up 90 feet under water, just removed my breathing tube, puked, put it back in. All inclusive is the way to go.
She should get an extra 30 days for that Georgia Rule movie......terrible.
I cleared a drunken path to my bed for you. If you hit clothes you've gone too far.
found a rock and smashed the sliding glass door. home safe. screen door is locked so we're good.
I just had to stop two people giving each other hand jobs in the pool. That was not something I was taught in lifeguard training
Would your heart desire to drink copious amounts of alcohol tonight?
Well at least the house will be decorated when u get evicted.
I never thought I'd say this, but I think I just saw the hottest pregnant chick alive.
I'm back in the dating scene now... Since the legality issue calmed down. And my stalking charges were dropped.
Get drunk. Masturbate to his picture. Fall asleep. Repeat. Fuck summer.
i fell into a bathtub last night and broke the fall with my forehead. my forehead is bruised
So what's it like to be pregnant?
It feels like I'm hungover and when I was drunk I was kicked off a mechanical bull and then trampled.
so this hot guy who looks like brad pitt circa troy era in my physics lab is staring at me right now and it's taking all the willpower I have not to procreate with him right now.
Randomize
