SEEEEXXX PLEASE
And that's when he stuck his finger up his own ass to prove it would feel good...
Ok Ghana you win again. Tell you what...Double or nothing over women's tennis, basketball, hockey, war, baseball, golf, swimming, diving, oil spills, box office proceeds, internet porn sites, criminals incarcerated, women's downhill, bass fishing, NASCAR, or GDP?
the plan is to continue having sex with all three of them until my birthday, and then once they've given me their presents, they can find out about each other.
I wonder if that one guy remembers you sticking salami to his forehead when he was passed out on new years eve.
We're past the whole "Did she just try to finger my ass?" Stage. Now it's encouraged.
Apparently, we were running around the apartment, singing into pickles, the routinely slapped our passed out friends with them.
The good news is I managed to avoid the three cop car looking for me. The bad news is I no longer have shoes.
Somehow me not being able to breathe due to cocaine doesn't seem very domesticated.
I mean you were pretty drunk at one point you asked if we could have a glass of water ready for you in case you choked while bobbing for apples, but you said grape juice was preferable. You can't choke on an apple btw
Hey dude. I've got a mini fridge in my closet now so we don't have to worry about getting drunk and falling down the stairs on our way to get more beer.
Showing girls my stab wound was not the brilliant idea I thought it was.
I mean, I'm shallow, narcissistic, and selfish, but I'm an amazing friend sometimes
Dad is celebrating turning 45 by being drunk in a department store before two o'clock.
She just kept screaming and saying "fucking you is like fucking a mountain"
Randomize
