glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
there are definitely too many half naked pictures of me out there for me to ever be famous.
new revelation: five guys for breakfast
new revelation: previous revelation not a good revelation
a creepy fucking ass man came up and started raven cawwing in my ear... he said it was the raven mating call. i am officially freaked out
I stayed up for an hour trying to make my room stop spinning and then I realized it was bc my fan was on
And for the fourth year in a row Christmas has ended in tears, yelling and me drinking. This is officially our longest running Christmas tradition.
We decided to play beer pong where the loser had to beer bong a pitcher of beer...people just started losing on purpose. It was a bad idea.
I'm alone drinking at the bar and the titanic theme song is on. This won't end well.
she tried to douche with champagne. in front of all of us. unabashedly.
Young lesbians are the worst. And also what got me through high school, sooooo
In the future, could you not call me 'bro' while we're having sex?
All I want is some guy to eat me out while I work on grad school things then go on his way
My saturday night consisted of sewing my Halloween costume and watching Blues Clues
You actually...sewed your costume?
I just drunkenly accidentally had sex with my boss
Did you at least ask for a raise?
No but I am now the owner of one of either his or his roomate's teeshirts... Maybe I can use it to negotiate?
He ate me out in a golf cart while I watched the sunset. You are so right, golf skirts do provide amazing access.
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