why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
You don't give head? I'm offended and I don't even have a cock...
I woke up with ten beers in my bag that hoarded at the party last night. Rally? Its five somewhere.
Facebook stalking a girl from Germany is harder then you think.you have to copy and paste all this shit into freetranslations.com then try and piece together an awkward sentence. If only I could put this energy into something productive.
I'm gonna go out on a limb and say it had something to do with pool sex.
Quick question. What's the protocol on going back to a bar after going home with one of their bartenders?
Go back and try to find another to go home with.
Went to 3 separate liquor stores today and I just made a huge tray of jello shots. This will be the Thanksgiving that puts all the others to shame.
He drew a face on his balls with a sharpie. It was like giving head to a unicorn.
Human Centipede: The Drinking Game. This is non-negotiable. First one to pass out the rest of us get to FEEEEED THEM!
It's great when the cashier at the liquor store asks "weren't you wearing those clothes yesterday"
So I just realized I have three bananas, seven condoms, three lube packets, three tampons, and a shot glass in my bag but no pen #modelstudent
You was so high that you insisted that you heard someone whistle, then you insisted they was trapped in the wall!
I like it here so far, only people are a lot less accepting of my terrible decisions and it's cramping my style
I love you, and I just washed my hair in my work sink with handsoap.
She's writing hockey erotica again.
Tell her to pick another team besides ours this time.
Randomize
