Approach what situation? Look, I dunno if you think I'm like some lezbo cheetah waitin in some shrubs to pounce on you the second I see you, but I'm not!
well, everyone in my office is getting a nice laugh right now. But seriously... please delete my number
Weddings at vineyards should never be allowed to happen. I'm pretty sure I drank every bottle they produced in 2008.
The fact that you think you peed off a roof shows you shouldn't have been on a roof.
Drunk. The frashmen love me. Give them. Toilrt paper. And shiots
I just want to steal his innocence through his penis. I really do.
She made out with the kickboxers bf. She was just asking to get kicked in the head. In the middle of the bar.
At 4 am, making my walk of shame, the hotel security followed me to my car with his flashlight shined directly on me. I felt like either a criminal or like I was about to get raped. Can't a girl sneak out of a hotel room without an actual spotlight on her?!?!?!
He made me eat donuts off his dick. donuts, jen. DONUTS.
Nothing bad can happen when you have a kiwi flavored condom. Absolutely nothing.
Yeah, you went up to him and said "I stare at people until they feel obligated to talk to me."
my cat just photo bombed my nudie.. does this qualify me as a cat lady?
I had to get my boss birth control a work today. I knew going to ASU would come in handy in my career someday.
SHE MASTURBATED TO THE THOUGHT OF ME HAVING AN ALL DUDE THREESOME WITH HER EX BOYFRIENDS.
Just googled myself and a bunch of boob shots of me came up. Apparently my phone automatically uploaded them to my google plus.
Please google me ASAP and ensure I corrected this...
we're gonna read the declaration of independence and do a shot for every word he doesn't understand.
Randomize
