I tried to give up sex for lent. It feels weird that on easter I'm this excited to be a whore again
Strippers tramp stamp says "mom"
The professor just announced to the class that I talked to him in the bar on my birthday.
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
But i don't feel like talking to him right now. I woke up an hour ago to a picture of his penis and I AM NOT A MORNING PERSON.
Dude, you chugged an entire bottle of tomato sauce and got us free drinks for the night. No way was I gonna stop you.
i'm scootering my little heart out so i'm not late for a weed pickup. this is the meaning of adolescence
2 men making out for 2 seconds to trick a cop so they don't get arrested for being pulled over rolling a blunt is not gay.
He said it was fake. Like really? Hey baby, I wanna sleep with you, so here's a picture of a fake tiny dick
The picture on Facebook I was just tagged in, with the mask, that is the definition of Carmen, my drunk alter ego
Ok she stopped using her fork and knife and is legit eating that steak using her hands.
I think we've gotten passed awkward... the day I woke up at the palms and ur getting eaten out by the dude who just fucked me on the balcony.
I just squirted in your honor. It's like pouring one out for the beautiful sex partnership that could have been
Woke up with a padlock locked onto my ear gauge and the first of many sticky note clues on my chest leading to the key.
its so awesome dude, its like im a magical unicorn or something
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