What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
Her little brother was home, so we had to hook up while playing hide and seek with him
all i remember thinking as i was puking my intestines out is : wow.. this toilet does look like it's from the future.
We were hooking up, both of us naked. She starts putting her clothes back on and says, "I have to go to the bathroom." I reply, "No you don't, you're leaving." Without hesitation she looks at me and says, "Yeah."
I wish I had a waterproof laptop so that I would watch porn in the shower.
I woke up naked in my own vomit. Not even in my bed. No one is happy.
just drew up plans to mow my front lawn into the American flag for world cup. that high and patriotic.
She started crying. I don't think she's gotten head from a sax player before.
I didn't realize I was holding it, until I was like, "whose baby is this?"
I really don't want to. I just don't know how to nicely say "dude I'm having a rough time in life right now and I just need to dress like a stripper cop, get shit faced, and have dirty crazy sex"
If you go to Tinseltown tonight. First bathroom on the left, second stall. Avoid. It's still coming to terms with what I did to it.
Would it be rude to use my vibrator? like he forfeited his right to be mad when he left me orgasmless...right?
She was nothing like her profile said, we had nothing in common, and her picture mustve been like 30 pounds ago. But yeah we hooked up
And that is why I love you so much. You have the same cold black heart as me.
Everything is covered in gelatin and pam cooking spray. Jesus be a shield.
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