I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
Why do guys in porn never have boxers on?
better question: why do you always text me when you're watching porn
then you put baby powder on the bottom of your feet and walked to your room so "ladies would follow the footprints"
I don't think i can handle my uncle say again that kid rock is a true musician....
Aside from the fact that there's a penis in my mouth, that's a pretty good picture of me
Is it sad that I have better conversations with his roommate before or after sex than I do with him in general?
Can't tonight. I'm supposed to get drugs for some college kids. Just doin my part in helping to enlight america's future
classified somewhere between kinky and medically inadvisable
The night got interesting when the random guy next to us handed us a bottle of champagne and the rest of his ciroc bottle. When we asked why he did it, he proceeded to point at his friend who face planted the floor.
You made me take a photo of you under the stairs at the bar. "Look I'm Harry Potter."
No he reached for my hand at the beach. I pretended to be a seagull.
I'm sober now, I ate a whole cantaloupe.
I can tell that I'm high when listening to celine dion becomes such a life changing experience
No I'm not high but I did cry for over an hour tonight because I realized that they never made a sequel to "Under the Tuscan Sun" with Diane Lane.
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