And we started making out. She asked me to pick a number between 1 and 10. I said 6. She took me to her room. A few minutes later I wasnt a virgin. DUDE I WAS GOING TO SAY 2.
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
i was about to cum until he started doing shrek impressions.
look, i dont wanna be "that girl" but if someone offers me coke in exchange for sex, i cant say no.
I passed out leaning next to a light pole. When the cop woke me up at 4 AM, I told him I was a block away from the apt, just had to stop to make a puke pit stop.
Totally forgot this... How weird was it when they were licking our faces
I guess I fell on the bar and kept trying to get back in telling the bouncer that I left my teeth at the bar. Woke up this morning with chipped tooth
If you happen to tell anybody my drunk story in the near future, please refrain from telling them about me shitting myself. People are getting the wrong idea and random people are messaging me on Facebook making fun of me for that
We have six bottles of wine and we are at target buying baby oil to grease up the sleds with, just in case you're interested.
Also he didn't buy condoms after we ran out last week. Luckily I had one, but I told him he should be more optimistic about getting laid
They pay me enough to pretend to be either helpful, or heterosexual. If they want both I need one hell of a raise.
We are the rockettes of vaginal bleeding
last night you made out with a 19 year old on a bar and i woke up with a swede in my bed. lets just say that never happened.
Hey, sorry I choked you last night... I was just really excited to see you.
Fuck you bitch. You're married. You got a live-in dick at home for your needs. I still gotta surf this shitty town's bars for cock
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