Nob stitches i do do not bleed anymorr!
I'm at subway, this 8 year old kid is judging my fashion sense with his dad. I want to kill myself.
It's ok, he's just 8, he's not judging you.
He just asked why I'm sitting alone. I honestly want to cry.
I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! Live in the flesh!
im trying to pick out the cookie crumbs from my adderall. it is a lot harder than it seems.
Apparently getting drunk, buying a guitar from your local costco and walking in to an open mic night is not the same as rocking out to guitar hero...
And then somehow we were arguing over how to fold our arms
He said he was trying to live vicariously through me. I didn't have the heart to tell him that meant he was vicariously fucking his best friend.
why would you automatically assume i'm high...
you just told me you're eating the powder of a lemonade mix.
it looks like my getting laid tonight is going to depend on my knowledge of native birds. this is a weird party
when i got home she was standing in my front yard not wearing a shirt and halfway crying/ halfway laughing
I snuck out three pillows from the hotel i was rolling so hard. They are like little clouds. I regret nothing.
He called yelling about whhhhhhiskey and enchiladas I heard sirens in the background last time I talked to him b
COME HERE AND I WILL SUCK YOUR COCK UNDER THE LIGHT OF THIS BEAUTIFUL ELECTRICITY
Banged former boss. Adulthood achievement unlocked.
my mom tells me this morning that i was blasting teach me how to dougie at 2 am last night and refused to leave her room until she dougied with me
Randomize
