Do ugly people know they are ugly?
The quiet ones do.
Donna and I are betting on whether or not you are going to cheat on your boyfriend tonight....I said you wouldnt do it.
You might as well just give her the money now.
Was just hit on by a guy with 2 kids and one was named Rocky. I need to get out of Buena Park.
Sandwiches eeeeeeverywhere.
He asked me how my body knew that a month was up when it was time for my period.
She had to put it in. I told her I was too drunk and didnt trust myself to not put it in her ass.
Random girl at this party just gave me a lap dance in a la-Z-boy. Night significantly improved.
My dad just gifted me an alaskan flag he stole from the govenor's mansion. He said it was to hang on the wall at 3316, to start a morning ritual. Then he mimed kegstands and vomiting. Senior year will be epic.
I got rejected. By another girl. At a red light. In front of seven shirtless cyclists in the middle of the night. How is that normal?!?
Tonights drinking will be celebratory and victorious. Picture the end of The Mighty Ducks set to beer.
hes duct taped to the wall and we're throwing eggs at him. i love thirsty thursday.
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
Fuck these runners passing me on campus as I'm waking to dinner. With my huggie. With flavored vodka and rum. Aka yum
No I did a yoga dvd and hit my ex up via email for some pot in exchange for his mail.
I'm on someone's yacht. I don't know who. But I'm on it. There's a guy passed out in a kilt holding bagpipes. Help.
Randomize
