after we finished we were both getting water at the kitchen sink...butt naked
so?
then my sister's foreign roommate walked out...in footy pajamas
Also I hooked up with a trainer at my gym. Between her, the married chick, and the bartender, my life is becoming a bad porn plot.
He threw me out a window and then threw raw ground beef at us. Normally you'd hate someone for that, but that guy's great.
It's not like I'm never gonna put out again. I'm a sure thing. I promise.
All I kmoe is rheres a coffee pot full pf vodka in my purse
From what I hear, her blowjob factory was runninng at full capacity this weekend.
Here's how he asked the pregnant girl for a cigarette. Hey yo prego throw me a square. Not joking.
I have a weapon and I'm not blacked out. Good as gold
He skipped an important family function with his dying father to fuck me. Terrible human, amazing fuck buddy.
Sorry for drunkely attacking your best friend with a bow and arrow then loudly crying myself to sleep....PMS?
Watching Supernatural does more for me sexually than the physical encounters with 90% of the men in my life.
For someone who claims to be straight, she knows a hell of a lot about bi erasure, and one Hayley Kiyoko song too many
The frequency with which I change my vibrator batteries is getting a little ridiculous....
I'm peeing on your house...you up?
It is like...the most transformative hard on I have ever had.
Randomize
