Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
today is the best snowday of my entire life. also its no shirt day.
im going to live freely with my legs opened and my heart closed
I'm out of mixers so I am using sugar water. Times are tough.
In other more interesting news I'm going to arrange a surprise orgy. You in?
I flashed some kids doing a church car wash. I feel like I really improved the quality of their lives.
I think anything that happens between 12 and 2 am is just sketchy enough to be a good idea.
Do I go to spinning class and try to redeem myself from going drunk, or do I wait a week and hope they forget I fell of the bike?
Soooo you know how I said I was trying to be a rational adult? Well that led to me fucking a rational adult today.
This is my second month of college and all I've learned is how to get a guy to go down on me without asking out loud and not to chase everclear with Smirnoff ice.
Essential life skills
Rock bottom: having sex rejected while your boyfriend talks in his sleep as you stuff your face with Girl Scout cookies
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
Trouble in the neighborhood - turns out my brother's summer lawn care gig also entailed banging three different MILFs and they just all found out about each other
Gotta pay for college somehow...
oh man there are to hot chicks wrestling in a pool of maple syrup. ill send you a picture
this is why i will never break up with you
Sorry. Im too sleepy to penis.
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