Small dicks are the new regular sized dicks.
I saved him in my fone as special pumba. he was just pumba but then he found me drugs
I don't know how to tell my mom that I'm not sober enough to drive to the dentist...
bro...we were banging on her floor and her dog walked in and started licking my balls
Well i just learned hong kong is a country...thank you olympics
i just opened up my bathroom cabinet to get deodorant and found 4 bottles of natty. Its like the world wants me to miss this interview
It just feels wrong masturbating with my neighbor's cat in my apartment
My kindergarten teacher served me... All coming full circle
I feel like I knew it was fucked up, but feared that god would take my dick away if I didn't use it last night.
She's an honest to god fucking ballerina. She did things I don't have names for.
I've injured myself in such a way that i am only capable of making love standing up now
He told me he wished he could shrink down to a small size so he could live inside my cleavage
I think I sold my soul to a dominatrix last night.
Just remember: We don't tell our English professor about our fetishes unless she specifically asks about them.
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
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