I always see him when I'm wearing my ripped pants. I think its because of the hole in the crotch. My vag sends out supersonic "I'm horny" waves to him. Otherwise the calls are muffled.
JoAnns office is warmer than mine. . .it must be because she has the gateway to hell under her desk.
Dude I'm telling you, conditioner is the best for jerking it in the shower. It feels great and afterwards everything is all smooth
after you threw up, you tried to prove you were sober by reading the ingredients off the shampoo bottles
he doesn't care that i have a boyfriend so why should i?
logic in its finest
before tonight, i was terrified of what tequila would make me do. but all it did was make me hook up with a movie star. sooo basically tequila's my new fave
I want to tell you about my weekend in person so I can see your look of judgement and disgust.
Also I hooked up with a trainer at my gym. Between her, the married chick, and the bartender, my life is becoming a bad porn plot.
Dude when the cops came you ran through the fence. Fucking THROUGH it. You're a master ditcher.
you kept saying how you wanted to mainline bacardi right into your bloodstream. medical school is doing wonderful things to your brain
I'll pass on that plan. The lack of my penis in new vaginas is no where on the itinerary.
I just want to return to LA when the weed and dick is plentiful.
I told myself I'd stop after three shots of fireball. Haha HA hA.
Saw the Peanut butter guy at checkout he had at least 30 containers of it and like 6 different kinds...
For the record, if you sneeze while you have a dildo in your vagina and you dont have a good grip on it, that thing can get some distance.
Randomize
