Also got home. Still stoned. Mom was up. We made a pizza and were writing a children's book. Sleep good.
The good news is the house is clean, the bad news is someone redecorated the bonus room by spray painting "free willy" on the wall in honor of the girl who passed out in there last night.
Bring a bathing suit for the glitter slip n slide
We were thinking he might be gay. Like how the fuck do you not even make out with a girl that made you a grilled cheese
I like to keep a steady black out going for the holidays. I feel it makes me less cynical
I mean I'm into guys with money but more into guys I'm actually attracted to
yeah i guess i'd rather he was hot than rich
wow i don't know if that qualifies as growing up but if it does i'm all in
The last thing I remember was riding in a grocery cart with two strangers while a cop pushed us
I just love it. It's warm and soft and the rest of the world is so mean. My bed would never be mean to me
you guys have a strange definition of the word fun. I would have said dangerous, terrifying, or life-threatening. of course, bowling can now be described the same way.
Apparently I came into our room and told her that there should be a zipline from our window to Walgreens so that I could get chicken noodle soup
I woke up in a front yard I didn't recognize to a grandma tapping me with her foot. What was in that punch?
I was on top for a full on make out when in dead silence "I'm moaning Myrtle" came from the TV. Moment ruined. I got cock blocked by a fictional ghost
I feel like I shouldn't be left around 30 year olds when I'm drunk
Yeah that was post sex. I was thinking in my mind, no wonder he didnt ask me to call him daddy since he actually is a dad
He weighed maybe 130, his dick had to be 30 of it. SO BIIIIG.
Randomize
