she has a tiny mouth but huuuge vocal chords
Do you think if Santa was real that he's have a big penis?
the last three girls i tried to get with all believed in abstinence... i think gods trying to keep me from being a father
i think girls just don't want to fuck you
He gets a blow job; I get my oil changed free of charge. And that way I only see him every 2500 miles.
Apparently we were arguing for captain seats so I shouted "who has your virginity." I got the seat.
Well you just missed the ten chi o pledges singing la bamba at our doorstep.
He literally cocked blocked all the dudes that tried to talk to the girls he was with, and they all loved him.
Same guy who tossed the brunet over his shoulder as they left screaming "Bring me my lucky shovel!"
Last night I dressed up as a cowgirl and walked into McDonald's. I bought 20 mcribs. There's pictures
Did she owns a vibrator that will set off seismic activity.
I'll miss you, too. On the bright side, a night away from one another might give me a chance to recup seminal fluids.
When you wake up with a bow tie and mustache drawn on your penis, you know you had a good night.
Trust me. My dick only does selfies for you.
I started my period on international women's day. It's like the world is congratulating me and punishing me for being a woman at the same time
right now I am washing the alcohol and shame off from last night
Let's not forget that we had sex on the ground in public tonight.
Randomize
