i am so afraid to go to the bathroom. i am afraid i am going to fall asleep on the toillet.
Special does not even begin to describe that text.
Latenightwjoannablackberrywontletmespaceitknowsimdrunk
She made me cum so hard I couldn't hear for half an hour after
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
Always thought my first night in jail would consist of fire and a bunny suit.
I just wanted to hook up with a white guy to prove that i could go back.
Hey if there is a better reason to go drink then "I've been fucking robbed!" I have yet to hear one. Also, I've been fucking robbed.
I have mastered the 3 minute room cleaning drill in preparation for the nights possible slam-piece
Still losing my voice, so I am trying to get it back through drugs. Welcome to my Monday logic.
Turns out the old man beside me in the waiting room was dead, but other then that it was a good day.
New year means new boundaries for the Brazilian lady.. I'm pretty sure I got wax on my asshole
There is a BIG difference between doing coke and getting peed on and getting peed on FOR coke
fond memories of taking my pregnancy test here in this Burger King
I'll truly miss your penis but your use of words and phrases such as bae, yolo, swag, and totes have ruined how attractive you once were.
I feel like your personal Bdsm barbie...
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