ugh, i have officially sinned in all of my cute clothes. i can't even wear any of them without feeling regret.
i spent my evening searching "the sims having sex" on youtube
we're no longer friends
just once id like to meet someone on craigslist who isnt fat
I never thought I'd hear the words "aww you pulled out" and "you're so sweet" in the same sentence.
we tried have sex after i gave him a handjob. he wouldnt get hard and kept saying his little boy is broken.. please come get me
Would it be cruel if i sold xanax instead of adderall to freshman unfamiliar to the drug-taking profession?
I just went to pick up my pigeon from your house. You should be getting a picture soon
I don't know what to tell you, usually I would just ask if they'd like to meet the captain. If you can't get laid it's your problem.
we've had our differences but let's set them aside, go home and fuck
I just ran into mom and dad day drinking at the bar while I skipped class and was day drinking at the same bar.
Opened the apartment door and the smell of sex and weed literally slapped me across the face. Kudos.
I'm to the point of desperation where I stare at customers penis imprints through their pants all day
It's almost sad. It's like the Harambe of vagina stories really.
Drunk text the hot guy two doors down confessing my love for him.... He gave me a thank you card today.
I JUST WANT TO HAVE AWKWARD SEXUAL EXPERIENCES WITH HIM.
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