If you want her to think you're a true humanitarian, you may want to stop referring to Hands Across America as "the Ghostbusters 2 of fund raisers."
i killed an earwig and left its corpse on the wall as a warning
You don't have to be emotionally available for a blow job.
My stomach is making the worst sounds, probably because there is nothing but semen in it.
The ratio of how much he pisses me off to how much sex i get just isnt working out for me
Just climbed to the top of a frozen waterfall! Do you want to do drugs tm night? The two are unrelated.
He literally sends me dick pictures, EVERY DAY. SEVERAL DIFFERENT ANGLES ..it's like I GET THE POINT.
Her facebook status said "just got a sign from god". I texted her and apparently she found a slice of pizza in the shower.
You almost married that.
Ong my arms are moving wo my consent
I woke up at 3am, my head in a toilet, still at the kegger, wearing a random cowboy hat.
U should feel bad.. u r like a sex politician. All talk and no follow thru
It's a gay bachelor party, it's not like dignity is to be expected
Her vagina was like a painting you can put your face in.
how do you expect me to pass the time when I'm too old to be jailbait but too young to legally drink
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
Randomize
