We really need to check into harvesting part of our liver now
there is a strobe light in my taxi. in what way is this safe.
I'm sitting here in nothing but my panties, eating beef jerky and reese's for breakfast.Today is not the day to expect me to make sound life decisions.
Would you wanna look up as you cum and for a split-second see your dad?
Remember those girls from the bar? The tall and short blondes?
Is this a story I am going to hate you for?
Well despite the fact that I'm still not entirely sure this isn't an elaborate/cunning plan to kill me, I'm in.
This is Jewish guilt versus Irish Catholic guilt. We should tread carefully, or we could fuck up the space-time continuum or something.
I'm okay with that.
That's what every 12 year old basketball team needs; a drunk and hungover lady eating KD whilst cheering them on. Highlight of their lives.
Last night I went to spank her while she was riding me and sack-tapped myself.
Do you remember peeing in the sink while I was throwing up?
No ma'am, I do not. I found a video of us trying to do a trust fall though. Emphasis on the trying.
You kept chewing on the empty milk carton and saying "kitty" over and over again. It was an interesting night.
When your hungover saltines taste like hope...
Well I just finished dry heaving so I think breakfast is a little further out for me
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
There are twenty eight units in that building. There has to be at least one heterosexual in it. You can't have fucked your way through all of it.
Randomize
