it feels like my vag is blowing bubbles
Another weekend, another 3 guys I have to awkwardly avoid while crossing campus...
how was your day?
fuck the small talk. are you bringing the liquor tonight or am i?
Just transferred the sun chips from that obnoxious Eco-friendly bag into a zip lock. Fuck the environment, that bag is loud.
Eventually evolution will just give us a better liver anyway, so our great great grandkids should THANK us for our binge drinking.
We did a shot for each one. Father... son... and holy ghost. That wasn't enough though so we moved on to toasting dead relatives.
Dude just read our convo. Apparently I was talking to you while I was naked. She wasn't happy about it.
You are a magnificent human being. I love you from head to toe. This wine is DELICIOUS.
I didn't realize how drunk I was until my vagina was in the snow.
you guys just sat there and simultaneously smoked bowls staring at each other... it was like a bowl off or something.
So nowhere in the dress code does it forbid me from showing up to City Hall in a gorilla suit to meet the mayor.
You have set the bar insurmountably high with apple pie and buttsex.
Rule 1: If any of us dies on a trip, the other two have to 'Weekend at Bernies' the shit outta that corpse...
so hungover. idk whos house or comp im on
He picked me up in Smart Car with the license plate “MYWHIP.” I think my ovaries shriveled up and died.
Randomize