at 4 in the morning i heated a family sized mac n cheese for a minute and decided to eat it frozen cuz I didn't wanna wait for that long
bad decision saturdays are such a good decision
Finished the final in under ten minutes and then puked in the bushes outside. I don't even care if I graduate anymore.
My internship group is made up of all freshman. Their enthusiasm for education and social interaction sickens me.
I was at a bus stop, eating a load of bread. Fairly sure I'm the poster child for poor students.
Making cookies for neighbors. Spill beer all over dough. Bake anyways. From good neighbors back to the shitty college kids next door in under 3 seconds.
Y'all best leave this "I can only have a couple drinks" shit at the door. U don't drive to Yukon to have a shot. I'm getting u fuckers drunk.
We had sex twice and at Wendy's how dare you diminish that.
You used his ass cheeks to demonstrate how to play the bongos and he still called you the next day. That's true love.
I just watched an old episode of Daria while eating brownies to cure day drunkness. Clearly I'm winning at adulting today.
So high I legit spent 20mins in the shower just holding my tits cuz they feel bigger than normal.
I woke up this morning to find myself laying in a beer puddle with "I'm sorry" written on the shaft of my dick and Nicole was nowhere to be found. Gotta love her
Let's make this a nightly thing. You'll explain the Watergate scandal like you're telling me a bedtime story while I eat popcorn high as fuck
We broke into a construction site had sex on a scissor lift and realized it was a church...tomorrow again??
One lesson I've learned so far from college: You've always got time for one more shot. Always
Randomize
