you guys are cousins why the FUCK are your pants off
Please, do not let 'babydaddy' catch on as your petname for me.
I slept with a married guy last night and then broke my toe on the doorframe on the way out. I've never seen karma work so fast.
We should live in a duplex and just hook up with randoms for the rest of forever and be animal hoarders.
Wow. This hand sanitizer smells awesome. It's like I just gave a handjob to a fruit basket.
I kind of learned that hotels are unnecessary. Boys will just take you home, but that's tough with a group. I believe in us, though.
BoomCity!!!
You don't have to text me that every time you have sex. I already heard you ring the gong.
You don't know true terror until you get stuck in a porta potty while frying your face off.
He was super adorable, like I wanna pinch his cheeks while I fuck him...
Also what’s the official rule on washing one guy’s jizz off my back before I go out with another guy? That I should?
So Saturday night after 10 drinks I guess he tried to have sex with me and in the middle of it I asked "can you tell I'm faking it!?" and then I sat up and threw up in my hand. That's a sex Win in my books
MY MOM WALKED IN WHILE I WAS EATING THEM OUT AND STARTED ASKING US ABOUT THE PROJECT RUNWAY EPISODE WE WERE WATCHING EARLIER
I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but yours is no longer the biggest penis I've seen. It is however, still the prettiest.
hopefully I won't be diving through a thorn bush to escape an explosion this time
I hate being the first one to text him all the time...I feel like Iook desperate to get laid when the reality is that im just really horny and he has a/c...
Randomize
