i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
I was wrong being drunk doesn't make accounting more interesting
I just wished the taco bell drive thru guy a happy cinco de mayo. Who says arizonians hate mexicans?
We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
You just kept yelling at the cabby "I own this cab" and insisted on smoking with all the windows up
Second night spent with creepy guy. I either need to change his nickname or stop doing this.
Its going to be drunk as shit/pirate themed. Im dressing as the former.
I'm sitting next to a ginger. She is decked out in olive green. Gingers fucking love olive green.
Nope. Daytime is texting time. Night time is you send me naked pictures time.
Maybe tomorrow I'll be drunk again and can provide you with texts at a more reasonable hour. Here's hoping. GOodnight. Tebow loves you
Kinda sad when you get home on a Sunday morning and the paper guy HAND DELIVERS the newspaper to you...,
His gf just liked my changed relationship status. She's gonna shit bricks when she finds out he left her for me. Bless her little heart.
Strip club, what strip club did I eat a steak at? That's the appropriate question
My books smell like weed. What does that tell you about my college experience?
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