forecast for tonight- shitshow with a chance of tbell
my version of bright and sunny.
Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
and before you know it i was laying next to him at 2 in the morning with penis and sadness on my breath.
Just saw a Mexican guy pushing a stroller with 3 twelve packs of corona in it with a toddler struggling to keep up on foot behind him
I am about to be in my happy place. (the shower with a 6 pack)
Dude idk, apparently telling two drunk chicks 'that's whats up' after watching them lick eachother's face wasn't the compliment they were looking for. I mean I was fucking hammered.
Wow.
I'll put it this way. My grandkids felt that fuck.
I had to hold off a girl who was trying to check your pulse while you were passed out. She kept screaming that she was a nursing major and needed to make sure you were alive.
I'm fighting fire with fire. When my parents interrogate me about what I was doing last night, I tell them the truth. Every disgusting, awkward detail. I'm 23 now and they need to get used to it.
Cavemen vs astronauts. weapons to be determined. Who would win?
Also, if you all get arrested i'm coming to laugh at you because i don't have the money for bail.
And the cockring thing wasn't sexual.
Do you remember the bathroom attendant when he put out his hand for a tip and you gave him a high five?
you must be at least a level 5 friend to unlock my sexual orientation
Road head absolutely translates. That's the beauty of road head... It's so portable!
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